My Friend is Struggling - How Can I Help?

We all deal with stress or anxiety sometimes, that's just part of being human.

But when someone is going through a ill-mental health, those feelings can hang around for a long time and start to affect their whole life. It can affect their sleep, study, work, relationships and how they see themselves.

If your mate is struggling, it's not something they can just 'snap out of' or 'get over'. Healing takes time and progress isn't always quick - and that's okay.

A lot of people stay quiet because they're scared of being judged or treated differently - it can make them not even want to tell the people who they are closest to. 

Keep an eye out for some of these signs:

• More emotional than usual - like being more angry, sad, worried or crying
• Not doing the things they usually enjoy
• Feeling hopeless about the future
• Having low energy or motivation
• Not acting like themselves - they could be starting fights, stealing or acting out
• Avoiding friends, family or social situations

You don’t need to be a therapist to be a good friend. Small, genuine things can make a big difference.

Start the conversation (gently)

Pick a chill moment and a private space.
Try something simple like:

“Hey, you haven’t seemed yourself lately. Do you wanna talk about it?”

Listen more than you fix

You don’t need the perfect words. Just listen. Let them talk without jumping in with advice straight away. Feeling heard matters.

If they’re not ready to talk

That’s okay. Don’t push it. Let them know the door’s open: “No pressure. I’m here whenever you want.”

Your presence actually helps

You can’t fix everything — and that’s not your job. Sometimes just sitting with someone, checking in, or hanging out like normal means more than you realise.

Encourage extra support

If they say they’re really not okay, you can suggest getting some backup. Offer to do it together if that feels easier, talking to a parent, teacher, GP, or a support service can help take the weight off both of you.

Take tough stuff seriously

If your friend talks about feeling hopeless or wanting to disappear, that’s a big deal. You’re allowed to loop in a trusted adult or counsellor, that’s not breaking trust, that’s keeping them safe.

Supporting a friend can be heavy. It’s okay to get support for yourself too. 

Get in touch with our Support Line for confidential advice and support. Over the phone or through webchat.